Coping Mechanisms

Only 5 days left until my due date. It's one of those assignments you can't ask for an extension on, either...and if you're told to hand it in early, you'd better be ready.
How am I dealing with this? In the usual way I handle stress and fear, with detachment and apathy. Things will be fine in the end. I did a bit of preparation a while ago and am mostly well-informed about what will happen so why worry?
Why worry? Because this time it's not a grade, or a class that needs to be passed, it's a human life that I will have to foster and protect. Knowing this doesn't seem to make much of a difference, however.
The babies things are not finished being set up in our room. I open my eyes each morning to an unorganized menagerie of furniture that seems like it can't fit in the space we have. I go shopping, hubs and Miss 3 in tow for storage solutions and can't manage to choose anything from the available options. We possibly need additional baby clothing but I've not the determination to go through everything we do have and check.
What I do have the passion for is sourcing cute nursing lingerie...hopefully the breastfeeding thing works out or else I'll be looking for ways to unload some high-end knickers and drop down bras...

The stuff nighmares are made of...

I was shocked to read that a Russian woman has given birth to a 7.75kg baby - that's 17.5lbs and more than double the average newborn weight! I thought perhaps I'd misread the headline and it should have read Russian woman gives birth to toddler. This is the type of story that makes us expectant mums very nervous...

Read the whole story here.

TMI?

There are days when questions regarding my pregnancy are met with annoyance and a curt response, especially when those questions come from strangers. There are other days, however, when I can’t stop burbling. Makes me wonder, how much information is too much? What do people actually want to know and what am I forcing upon them when I’m in my “receptive” mood?
Today has been a day of burbles. I’m in a familiar environment with a familiar group of clients and I seem to be talking an awful lot about myself. And my bump. I think the type of information I give is relatively innocuous and certainly not TMI in the sense that I’m not talking bowel movements or discharge. But really, is the type of information I’m disseminating interesting? Due date, gender, agreement that my feet are a bit swollen and I’ve broken out my jandals on non-working days, minor complaints about the physical aspect of my job, the fact that my maternity leave starts on Friday… Blah, blah, blah.
I was looking at yesterday’s newspaper today while eating lunch and I saw in the “Sideswipe” column, a reader submitted blurb about parents over-indulging their desires to talk about their offspring. Apparently this man had been stuck on a long international flight beside a new mother and heard all sorts of interesting tid-bits about whether baby slept the night, how many diapers they went through in a day, how much the bub was eating, when the first smile was, etc, etc. I thought to myself, “Poor man, nowhere to escape on an airplane” and then began wondering if I’ve started to morph into the woman sitting next to him.
If you end up sharing space with me before or after I give birth and I can’t find a more interesting topic than the impending arrival of my child or what it’s been like since she’s arrived, go ahead and tell me if you’re bored with it. I won’t be offended…I promise. Well, I’ll try not to be offended. It would be good if you managed to let me know how interesting other things I may have to talk about are though…

Personal Space? What's That?

So, yesterday I made a foray to the mall to collect party goodies for the upcoming 3 year old madness that will be happening this Sunday and to shop for the perfect present for said 3 year old. All was good, the shopping was fruitful and hubs agrees that I've chosen a suitably brightly coloured and exciting present befitting a 3 year old.
While my focus was on a 3 year old, everyone else's focus was on someone who has still about 30 days before making her debut.
The first shop I went into, an elderly lady said hello and began asking me questions such as "how much longer have you got to go?" and "do you know what you're having?" I just thought she was a lonely elderly lady. I was wrong. In each shop I visited, someone managed to comment on my belly. "When are you due?" or "How much longer?" were the most common questions and I think my answer of 4+ weeks to go surprised many. The other comments tended to be "Wow, you're big!" or "I bet you'll be happy when it's over." One lady shared with me how a week ago she'd delivered a little boy 7 weeks early and was just out doing some shopping to finish the nursery before they let him out of the hospital.
People have also begun to imagine it's appropriate to rub my stomach. I am not a Buddha and I will not bring you good luck. Up until very recently, the only people who had been brave enough to touch or rub my stomach are my husband, my husband's daughter, my MIL (although hers have been quite tentative little touches) and one of my friends before she went back to Canada and the belly was barely a bump. One of the ladies who questioned my due date yesterday, reached out and gave my stomach a bit of a stroke which shocked me - she was a complete stranger. And I was left feeling somewhat akward when a very nice lady who runs one of the venues where I teach first aid classes put one hand on either side of my bump and rubbed up and down while cooing something to the baby (at least she was not a stranger). I'm not quite sure of how to respond to these things...if I wasn't pregnant, there's no way you'd be so familiar and rub my stomach, so what's changed? Do pregnant women, once they reach a certain stage, lose their right to privacy and personal space?

Bunny Bump

Hubs and I have chosen a name for our little girl, but we're not advertising. If it was up to Miss Almost 3, her name would be Suzie (Siouxsie, perhaps?) or Charger but I don't think those pass muster.

The ever-cute Kendra, of Girls of the Playboy Mansion fame, is expecting as well. She's due on Christmas Day - about 11 weeks after me. That makes her about 21 weeks at the moment. She's recently found out that she and her football player husband, Hank Baskett, are having a boy. What are they naming him? Hank Baskett IV, of course.

Here are a couple pics of Kendra and her hubs as she shows off her new bump.

If you want to keep up with Kendra's development, you can follow her blog, her facebook page, or her twitter!

The Final Countdown

That's what they call it when you get into single digits. And here I am at 31 weeks pregnant. 9 weeks to go.
For me the final countdown is having everyone remark how big I am or questioning whether I'm going to give birth during CPR demonstrations; it's having to wear wrist braces to bed and sleep with my arms straight while laying on my left side; it's more frequent meltdowns; it's continued obsessions with food and shopping; it's antenatal classes where I feel anti-social; and it's fear and self-doubt.
On the plus side, it also means there is a party coming up. A baby shower. I was thinking of just planning and doing it all myself but my friend, Bianca - who is also expecting, offered to help me plan and execute it. I love planning parties and I've seen, and blogged about, some pretty cool baby shower ideas. I don't know if we'll go for an all out theme but we're planning a meeting next weekend to talk about it and do a bit of brainstorming. The other thing that makes it so amazing that Bianca has stepped up to do this, is that she will be on holiday the week before the date we've set for the shower. Thanks again, Bianca, it's going to be so much fun :)

The Third Trimester

So, baby is getting close and I should be getting excited, right?
I am in the 2nd week of my third trimester and baby is 11 weeks away. In terms of normal every day stuff, 11 weeks seems like ages. In terms of the reality of having a baby here 24/7 it seems like an impossibly short amount of time.
I wake up from dreams of being an inadequate mother and still would rather lounge on the couch than set up a baby room. I get jealous when I run into people doing the things I wish I was doing - like riding a scooter along the water and then going for coffee, or having a glass of wine. I feel nothing but selfish when I allow someone to do something nice for me (like the other day when my MIL took me out shopping and I came home with a multitude of tops and even a pair of shoes).
Hormones are raging and I'm very moody and not toddler friendly. It seems to me that almost 3 year olds should be able to act in the ways they are asked and be lovely creatures at all times. I know, in reality, it's a big ask for an almost 3 year old to sit quietly or play only with their toys and not various household items they may prefer but honestly...
Week 29 is characterized by edema (swelling), moodiness, and the need to nest. I'm there, almost. At least baby is doing well - supposedly 15 inches and 3lbs - and would be 90% viable if she were to come early.

The Pregnant Pin-Up

Some time ago, I posted about my friend Shayna Kerrie of Shayna Kerrie Photography who has done some great pregnancy and newborn photography. As I get bigger, I have days where I hate my body but other days when I marvel at the amazing shape and proportions. I'm about 80% certain I'd like to get some professional photos done while I'm pregnant, but I don't think the style that Shayna favors (and it seems similar to most of the local photography websites I've found featuring a pregnancy gallery).
Instead, I'd like to have a bit of fun with the whole thing. I'm into retro and pin up art and think it would be great to do some photos styled in a 1940's Vargas girl theme. I've found a local photographer who specializes in pin-up photo shoots including hair, make up, and wardrobe called Miss T Pin-ups. Their gallery looks good, but I'm hesitant about the $470 price tag for the package I think would suite me.
I've been mulling this idea over for a while but haven't been able to decide if I thought it would "work" to have a pregnant pin-up girl. Today, I did a bit of searching and came across some great images...

I'm enjoying the lingerie and parasol in this one.

A cool illustrated Pregnant Pin-up.

A very cute classic pin-up pose.

Products for Preggies that bring on the LoLs

Ages ago (okay a few months ago), I was complaining about belly bands and my pants falling down. No one came to me and told me there were garter belts that would keep my pants up. When I saw them today, I burst out giggling. Would I actually attach suspenders to my bra to help keep my pants up? They seem really funny but at the same time, useful. Hmm... If you're interested, you can find Belly Ups here.


So I suppose I'm at the stage when people are going to start touching my bump. I'm not sure how I feel about that. When I teach classes now, to avoid being bombarded with questions about the bump during breaks, I've begun to add small details about the bump in my introduction (it's a girl, due Oct). The bump is certainly quite big now and there are times when you can't just feel the movement but see this little monster kicking me. These temporary tattoos are a good novelty item if you're into exposing your belly. These tell people where they can touch, what the sex is, or on a bad day tell them to get lost. If you want them, you can get them at Perpetual Kid.

23 Weeks

At 23 weeks, I have dull hair, carpal tunnel syndrome along with swelling in my hands and feet, occasional bleeding noses, and the attention span of a fruit fly. Overall, I feel fine and can't complain too much; I did sign up for this after all.
The other day, I was reading a synopsis of what is happening when you're 23 weeks here. Yes, I am starting to feel better about my body - looking pregnant is preferable to looking fat. No, I'm not having back pain or sciatica. Good news! Apparently, baby is about a foot long (30cm) and weighs about 1 lb (just 440g) which gets me wondering how I've gained so much but that's another train of thought all together. Over the next few weeks, baby is working on developing her lungs, practicing breathing (sucking in amniotic fluid), and gaining fat. The article recommends cherishing your sleep ins - I'm so there - and looking for options for baby's sleeping arrangements (done and dusted).
So here I am continuing to plod along. I've managed to pick up some more day to day clothing and find some things in my wardrobe I'd forgotten about. I even purchased a new wool jacket for the winter - a wonderful fit in the shoulders and arms and plenty of room to grow in it (it's a swing style jacket from the label Bahaus which is sold in Jet stores in New Zealand). I might start using some sort of shine enhancing product in my hair and go see the physio for wrist braces to wear at night to help with the carpal tunnel. Next midwife appointment at the end of the month to ensure things are going as well as they seem and hopefully a couple dates with hubby over the next few weeks also.

A Sling, A Marvelous Thing...

Along with some other much appreciated baby gear, my husband and I were given a baby backpack. You know, the type that looks very much like a rucksack with a frame. Looking at it, I think it would be a good idea but just not something I'd ever wear. The plan is for Hubby to use it from time to time and see how he likes it.
It got me interested though, in what alternatives there are to baby backpacks out there. As I surfed around the internet, I came across many types of contraptions - from elegant to ugly- that people use to "wear" their babies.
I was unaware there was a whole community and heaps of research on the idea of "baby wearing" so I did a Google search and found TheBabyWearer.com. This website has heaps of information about baby wearing and I am certainly interested in learning more and trying it out. According to research, wearing your baby is good for baby's physical, mental and emotional development, and will help them cry less. Sounds good to me! Now to find a baby carrier that suits my style...there are some even worthy of celebs out there so I know they exist - if I can't justify the price the one I like I may even try making one myself.


TheBabyWearer.com has a whole page of links to help you sew your own baby carrier. There are ring slings and pouches, mei-tais and man-tais. Everything down to doll slings for older children to use with their toys and no sew versions. My favorite link from the links is to KarmaBaby where they sell pouch-style carriers in fabulous fabrics and even give you instructions to make your own in case you're like me and would rather make something than buy it.
So, once I'm finished the quilt I've started for our older girl, I'll go ahead and try one of the KarmaBaby pouches - wish me luck!

Bundeling the Bump

It's June and it's COLD. Despite the lovely blue sky and shining sun over the first days of June I have been able to recognize winter is here. Each morning this month there has been a layer of frost on my car requiring a good scrape or for the car to run 10 minutes to defrost it.
I grew up in Canada and am so used to heading into summer around this time of year. This will be my 3rd winter here in New Zealand and although I know and understand summer can't last all year, I still subconsciously expect nice weather in June.
I have said before that I'm finding dressing during pregnancy a challenge. The the colder weather, one of the biggest challenges I'm finding is keeping warm enough! I have a long wollen coat that I've worn in years past that has always been a bit roomy...unfortunately, only the top 3 buttons do up at the moment and it's a wee bit drafty.
I thought finding a maternity coat would probably be like looking for any other maternity clothes - lots of them out there without many suiting my style or budget. What I've found, however, is a distinct lack of cold-weather coats for those of us "in bloom" at the moment. Many of the coats I see in maternity shops are not lined or they are cropped-sleeve jackets (which I love the look of, but can't rely on to stay warm).
Why don't I just buy a larger sized regular coat a friend asked me. The thing is if you buy a winter coat several sizes too large, it may be too long and look frumpy; also, the sleeves may be too long and the shoulders probably won't sit in the right spot. Right now I'm looking at cape and swing style regular coats to get the right fit in the shoulders and arms with a free size around the belly.
Online, I've found several reasonably priced options in America but once shipping is added (sometimes as much as doubling the cost of the item) and the exchange rate calculated, all illusion is shattered and I'm spending as much as $500 for a coat. If you're in America, however, A Pea in the Pod seems to be a great source for a range of maternity and they have a lot of sales on currently.

Gender Bender

So, what'll it be? Boy or Girl? Girl or Boy?
Some parents wait until their due date to find out but I am that kind of really curious person who would peek at Christmas presents if I thought I wouldn't get caught!
Today is the day of our 20 week scan. Both my husband and I are hoping to find out the sex of our baby. Not that it matters mind you... I suppose we're hoping for a boy but only because of all the girls born in the family already (7 girls and no boys in the youngest generation so far).
There are a number of less scientific methods of predicting the sex of your baby. Are you hairy? It's a boy! Is the bump low? It's a boy! Is the bump high and visible from the back? It's a girl! Does your wedding ring swing like a pendulum over your stomach when suspended from a strand of your hair? It's a boy. Does your wedding ring move in a circle over your stomach when suspended from a strand of your hair? It's a girl. Is the fetal heart rate over 140? It's a girl. Do you crave cheese and meat? Boy. Do you crave sweets? Girl. Is your right breast bigger than your left? Boy! There are also various online quizzes which will tell you - mine have said boy. And last but not least if the year you conceived in and the age which you conceived at are both odd numbers then it's a girl.
It's all very confusing really so I'm really looking forward to something scientific today! Is it a boy? We'll see but we won't be disappointed either way.

Dressing for Two

At 19 weeks pregnant I’m definitely showing. I suppose I’ve been showing for several weeks now and indeed, I’ve been noticing changes in how my clothes fit since about week 11. I’m at the point now where my regular pants don’t do up and most of my shirts are too short, so I’ve really had to make an effort to tackle this belly issue.
I’ve looked around at brick and mortar stores, online stores, and online auction sites and have felt mainly disenfranchised. Much of the maternity wear doesn’t really fit my style first off, and then there’s the issue of cost. I’m not one to normally spend heaps on clothing (well, not lately anyway) so it seems extravagant to me to spend $100s on articles of clothing I may wear only a handful of times in the next several months.
I have managed to pick up several items and am coping for the moment. I’ve purchased jeans and work pants from a maternity shop, several nice shirts from a regular shop (but they are long and stretchy and will do for some time), and jeans and maternity lingerie online. I’ve also been very lucky to receive some hand-me-downs from a family friend; even though several of the items are still too big, I’ve got a long way to grow!
I intend to stick to my regular style, which is slightly alternative, throughout my pregnancy so I know I will have to continue to look carefully for pieces that suit my style and my changing figure. I may even have a go at making or modifying some clothes to my specifications. I’ll keep you updated :)

PS - If anyone knows of a great looking dress up or down style of maternity pant that won't threaten to fall down at every step without wearing a belt let me know!

Happy Mother's Day

Today is 10th May, Mother's Day. We will be celebrating by visiting my husband's parents for Sunday lunch. Sounds good to me.
Yesterday I had a nice day meeting up with a friend who recently, and unexpectedly, told me she's also expecting. She hadn't been planning on a baby, indeed she had been planning a 6 month trip to Europe instead. Things have changed substantially for her with her news but she seems happy and like she's adjusting to it well. We had a nice brunch and then went on the prowl for maternity clothing and for a browse at baby stuff. Each of us got 1-2 new tops and I bought some baby socks and booties as well as a onesie.
I hope all mother's out there are having a fabulous day today and that they end up spoiled by those who love them this Mother's Day. Which reminds me...Mom, if you're reading this, I haven't forgotten you, I'm just running late ;)